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An Open Letter From Chelsea On Getting The F Over Yourself
Chelsea Fagan
March 31, 2025
March 31, 2025
Hello and welcome to The Financial Diet's weekly newsletter!
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And don’t forget to join us TONIGHT for our very important March Society workshop, Your Money Under Trump, hosted by friend of TFD and investing expert, Amanda Holden!
❤️ TFD
Dear Gentle Reader,
The rumors are true! The wait is over! Drumroll please… I’ve written my second romance novel! It’s called THE HIGH DIVE, and it’s an enemies-to-lovers story that mostly takes place on a yacht (!). And before we get into the financial nitty gritty (because why else are we here?), please enjoy a quick summary of the story, as well as the cover, to help catch a vibe:
Elevator pitch: Ten years ago, he broke her heart. For the next ten days, they’re in uncharted waters. Take a decadent yacht trip through the Mediterranean with political strategist Alex Onassis as she confronts Danial Azad, fellow former scholarship kid and the one person she swore she’d never see again. Reunited with their elite college friend group for a bachelor trip, and with Danial now one of the rich kids, this voyage leaves Alex torn between her deepest values and her most undeniable desires.
Everything you need to preorder your copy is here, and if you’d like to request an early copy for review, you can do that here. I’m personally obsessed with this book — especially the blend of real-world class and financial stakes with pure escapism — and will be doing a bunch of really fabulous events again to celebrate it, so keep your eyes peeled in the coming weeks.
But now, onto the professional/financial/emotional ~real talk~, because publishing has become both a lucrative side hustle and genuinely transformative creative pursuit for me:
If you didn’t know, I’m actually publishing two books this year, this romance novel under my own imprint (in the US, international editions are licensed) at the end of May, then a hosting book with Penguin Random House in late October -- which I'll be back to talk about when the time comes, of course! As I’ve spoken about at length, I believe that true creative and financial liberation for authors comes from pursuing a hybrid publishing model. There are advantages to both traditional and self-publishing, and there are limitations to each. Long story, though, this blend wherein my fiction paperback books are published myself (and I therefore have exponentially higher royalties), and the nonfiction goes through publishers (where I can command larger advances), evens out to a very sustainable model that averages around $100,000 of annual publishing revenue for my LLC, before my profit sharing with collaborators.
That being said, ramping up to this model has definitely taken some trial and error. As to the startup costs of my self-published title, for my first book -- where I was figuring everything out as I went, and wasting a lot of money in the process -- I ended up spending around $60,000 out of pocket to bring it to market. I've been profitable on that book for quite some time and continue to sell steadily, but it's very clear to me that much of that money was wasted on experimenting with things like distribution models, printing methods, costly in-person events, and elaborate gift mailers. My goal is to bring the total investment significantly down this time, closer to $35,000, and further reduce expenses by being more proactive about corporate sponsorships to fund things like events and gifting.
As to my traditionally published title, out of my advance (which was $120,000, paid out in four installments over two years, and out of which I pay my contractors like a photographer and illustrator), I also plan to dedicate some marketing dollars from my own pocket, as well as seek out brand partnerships to fund bigger things like a book tour. I've learned that if you want books to be successful -- and the business of them to be sustainable -- your responsibility lies as much in the marketing of your work as the writing of it. I know that some authors feel averse to this, but I actually feel the opposite: investing directly into my creative work from a financial and logistical perspective means treating it with respect, rather than outsourcing the work to someone who almost definitionally will care less than I do.
I will write more as the year goes on about the finances, but for now I want to talk a bit about the emotional aspect of this, because that has also been a huge learning curve. When I published my debut romance, my first foray into self-publishing after over a decade of only working with traditional publishers, I felt extremely anxious at the prospect of vouching for myself. It's actually part of the reason I overspent so much the first time around: because I didn't want any aspect of my process to feel "cheap" or "amateur." And while I enjoy the creative freedom (and backend revenue) that owning my own books provides, there is something undeniable about the cachet and validation of an institution backing you up. Now, of course, I feel perfectly value-neutral about the method I use for publishing, but it took me a while to get there.
When I announced my book on Instagram last week, a lot of women messaged me to say that my approach to creative projects gave them confidence to pursue something of their own, without necessarily waiting for permission. In addition to being far and away one of the kindest and most flattering things a person could say to me, it's also something I'm thinking about a lot as I'm getting older: the art of getting the F over yourself. Because yes, some of it is about confidence and following through and passion and all that, but a lot of it is just about not taking yourself too seriously. In a similar vein, you might have noticed that we've started posting more informal videos on our YouTube channel in light of all the chaotic political and economic news, and while it was a little scary at first to put ourselves out there in a way that didn't feel perfectly polished or "professional," they've become some of our most popular and resonant videos in a matter of weeks! Turns out, people care more about authenticity and message than they do about production value.
In whatever I do, though, getting over myself is about giving myself full and enthusiastic permission to experiment, and to do so imperfectly. While I'm extremely happy with the success of my first novel -- and I've got some insanely exciting news on that front to share soon! -- I can see a thousand ways in which I've improved with my second. If I had waited until I'd achieved some arbitrary definition of perfection, or relied on the cosigning of authority figures to validate me, I likely would have never done it. And in relieving yourself of that oppressive need for everything to feel "final," we can also take so much joy in the process of learning, even if we're learning out loud. (This obsession with things being perfect, as it pertains to writing, is why the vast majority of writers never even complete or pursue that first manuscript: because they're always waiting for a time when they feel "ready," which never quite comes.)
When I look back at things I would have done differently -- whether a bit of dialogue in my first novel, or a segment from an old video essay -- I don't cringe. I don't feel regretful for having done it in a way that I now deem flawed by my current standards. I love that I can look at my own progress and process as a living, breathing thing. It makes me thrilled to think of how much more I'll learn and grow by the time I'm onto my next one. We as humans have this (somewhat unfortunate) habit of feeling like everyone is staring at us, watching our every move. And sometimes they are, no doubt, but those times are few and far between. For the most part, people are focused on themselves, on their own insecurities, and on their own projects. We are free to try, to ride our bikes in an unsteady wobble and even fall over a few times before we feel steady on our wheels.
Whatever the thing you've been thinking of doing or trying, I urge you to find ways to do so without waiting for permission or perfection. If we want to stay feeling young and alive in our bodies and minds, the absolute most essential ingredient is curiosity. Because what we so often associate with youth is actually just a willingness to learn, or to be amateurs at something. And often it's just our own ego that stands in our way, this fear that we'll be judged for doing something imperfectly (rather than admired for having tried at all, which is the most likely income). Most people, especially as they age, have more and more dreams or ideas relegated to the "what if?" column. This can easily curdle into resentment or bitterness towards the people who try, or who complete things. But I assure you that we all have the capacity to walk unapologetically in the direction of the things we want, it just requires a healthy dose of getting the F over ourselves.
— C
1) I adore color. I adore stereotypes being trampled. I adore funny women. So, imagine my glee when I discovered that there are now 2 full seasons of my fave new Netflix obsession, “Survival of the Thickest,” starring, co-created, and executive produced by THE Michelle Buteau currently available
If you aren’t already familiar with the queen, she is a comedienne extraordinaire and has taken it upon herself to create a show for the color-lovers and curvy vixens. Here’s a little blurb about the show: “ ‘Survival of the Thickest’ casts Buteau as Mavis Beaumont, a fashion stylist who dreams of dressing women with larger bodies so they can be their most confident selves. When Mavis’ long-term relationship with a well-connected photographer (Taylor Selé) implodes due to infidelity, the split forces her to go out on her own, renting a doorless bedroom in a shared Brooklyn apartment and seeking out new clients. She also leans on her two best friends: Khalil (Tone Bell), a recovering lothario attempting his first real relationship, and Marley (Tasha Smith), a corporate type who’s confident at work but more tentative in exploring her sexuality.”
I personally appreciated getting to see a plus-sized, Black woman as the beautiful main character with all kinds of sexy love interests ;P .
It’s short, it’s sweet, and it’s hilarious. Add it to your Netflix list and cozy up this weekend to binge!
2) I’ll be moving away from DC by the end of the year so, I’ve taken it upon myself to start really seeing the city rather than just living in it. If you’re moving away soon or just want to start seeing and appreciating more of your city I highly recommend treating it like a tourist too.
To start: create an IG folder and/or a TikTok collection for all your finds. You’re bound to come across all kinds of events and coffee shop recommendations and exhibit reviews while you scroll online. Well, instead of saying, “Hmm… cool,” start saving them! Then, once a week, go through your folder and start adding each spot as a saved location on your Google Maps app. Use an emoji to differentiate between restaurants, coffee shops, bookstores, museums, etc… and add a note describing what it was about this place that especially nabbed your attention.
Now, eery weekend, when I’m chilling in bed wondering what I’m going to do that day, I just open my Google Maps app, look at what’s close by, and head out. No thinking required! I’ve made new friends, met some cuties (;P), and have developed a newfound appreciation for my city. I know I won’t have any regrets when it’s time to leave because I’m using the time I have now to let the city show me her magic. I recommend you do the same!
🎥 Our March video essay, You’re Being Gaslit By Generational Wealth, is now live over on our YouTube channel. This one is a must-watch! Reminder that $4.99 and up members of the Society at TFD get the ad-free extended version of this video, and all our video essays!
✨Reminder to join us for our March Society workshop, Your Money Under Trump, happening TONIGHT, hosted by friend of TFD and investing expert, Amanda Holden! This event will cover investing strategy, “ethical” investing, understanding investment markets, as well as social security and financial planning, specifically in these chaotic times. Amanda will answer all of your biggest questions including: Should you invest right now?, How should your portfolio be positioned?, What else can you do to protect yourself financially?, What is going on with Social Security?, How can we use personal privilege and power to build something better for all? and more! Join The Society at our $4.99 or up tiers to register!
💸Check out our brand new capsule series on YouTube, The Budget Fix, co-hosted by TFD creative director Holly Trantham and financial educator Berna Anat. In this series, Holly & Berna are dissecting real-life budgets from members of the TFD community in order to help you better reach your long-term money goals!
🎙️Make sure to catch up on our latest podcast capsule series, LOVE IS BLIND, BUT MONEY TALKS. This 5-part series is co-hosted by Holly & TFD’s Content & Production Manager (and overall amazing person), Alexa. The entire series is now available for Society Premium members! In this series they’re deep diving into Love Is Blind season 8 as well as previous seasons, who we adored, who we may need to warm up to, why money and political conversations should be featured more in (and out of!) the pods, and how the show has proven that love really isn’t blind. Our next podcast capsule series is dropping in May. Stay tuned for more deets!
🎥And don’t forget to check out our YouTube capsule series, Asked & Answered, cohosted by Chelsea & Erin Lowry of Broke Millennial. This is a 6-part series dedicated to answering your personal money questions, from budgeting and investing basics, to navigating the financial headlines of our current political climate. The finale is dropping this Sunday, so make sure to catch up on the first 5 eps, available now! Due to popular demand, we’re coming back with season 2 of Asked & Answered! Do you have a question you want answered by Erin & Chelsea? Email your question to [email protected]!
📚And not in company news, just something we want to share: Pre-order friend of TFD, Anna Gifty Opoku-Agyeman’s new book, The Double Tax! How much does it really cost to be a woman in America? Written by a rising star in economics, Anna Gifty Opoku-Agyeman, The Double Tax is the first book to summarize the costs women face as they navigate life's biggest moments. Not only do the numbers and stories reveal that women incur higher costs than men, but also that dramatic gaps in career life, motherhood, retirement, and more among women are shaped by the color of our skin. To pre-order, click here and to get involved with the book campaign click here!
The Society at TFD is our members-only community with access available on both YouTube and Patreon. Joining The Society is the best way to directly support TFD! The Society offers the exact same things on both platforms, so choose whichever one you prefer!
We offer 3 tier options:
The Society at TFD Lite: $2.99/month
Monthly office hours with Chelsea to chat and get your personal questions answered
Access to our monthly book club hosted by TFD Creative Director, Holly
Illustrated tech backgrounds every month
Access to Society Discord
The Society at TFD: $4.99/month — includes everything in the $2.99 tier plus:
Monthly ad-free extended director's cut videos from Chelsea
Exclusive members-only events and workshops
Complete post archive (including exclusive members-only videos of Chelsea ranting on different topics)
The Society Premium: $9.99/month — includes everything from the previous tiers plus:
Weekly newsletter from Chelsea
Monthly multi-page workbook/guidebook on a different topic each month
Members-only capsule podcasts